Wednesday, 9 December 2009

The Biggest Advent Calendar in Europe

Yes, the biggest Advent Calendar in Europe is in my current home town “Gengenbach”

As every year this Advent Calendar and its unique x-mas market attracts all people around the world to come over. It is a “multi culti” event for everyone, if you are green, yellow, purple or

pasty, here on this special market it doesn`t matter - we are all one crowd ( maybe because it is always very dark when people are starting to storm the market – opening hours from 18:30 – open end or the influence of too much “Glühwein”( a special hot x-mas punch here in Germany). Anyway everybody is invited, but it will cost you! Therefore a few advises

how to behave on the market and how not as follows:

- When you walk through the market and it is around seven p.m, please see that your

head and face are very good protected as some people trying to stick their sausages in your face or even worse forcing you to smell their breath.

- Do not talk too long to an Italian citizen of Gengenbach you could end up buying his car, dog , his bicycle or even his wife. They love making business on the market

- Do not give donations in form of money to the kids who are walking around the x-market – big danger – these kids belong to Antonio Lino Banfi from Campobello

- Always visit the market with a bunch of people, otherwise it could happen that

you will find yourself the next day waking up naked handcuffed to a tree.

One more thing do not stand beside an old woman when you are drinking your Glühwein or eating your sausage etc…as they will do anything to get your sausage or your drink( just for explanation near the town is a nursing home and sometimes they have a few escapees- so pay attention)

I was last week-end on the market as I am just living ten minutes away from it and it was nice and enjoyable, but didn`t convince me to buy a x-mas tree this year. Last time it was too much trouble to get rid off this stupid thing. Neighbours and myself threw this thing then over the fence of the most annoying neighbour in the middle of the night. A good thing, that his dog actually likes us very much! Thanks, Oskar!

In spite of that I like trees where they are in the forest and not in the sitting room for a fewdays and watching them actually dying. Plastic ones are far worse they are mad in China and could explode – happened to my grandma`s real x-mas tree as she bought the wrong light bulbs for her x-mas fairy lights – they were too strong apparently…I thought the x-mas tree looked much more real after explosion .

If you like to learn more about this fantastic town famous for its old buildings, wine and Kneipen , please have a look at this website

Here is a x-mas song. It is not Wham

Merry x-mas

And finally if you really want to see evil children doing the devils work at Christmas look at this video and scare the crap out of yourself. (I may have added this bit, PB)

Really Scary Stuff


  1. I wouldn't like an old woman taking my sausage.

  2. Yes you would and you know it!

  3. Why not?She could be hungry

  4. Never trust a hungry sausage eater, they may have bad breath. Didn't you read the warning?

  5. And they have no teeths

  6. and I wouldn't want somebody sticking their sausage in my face either!

  7. For the first time ever we have agreement; everyone to keep to their own sausage.

  8. I shouldn`t have mentioned it - I didn`t want to upset people with sausages, but you can have there as well Kebaps, Schnitzel and of course the famous Currywurst...

  9. I had currywurst earlier in the year in Berlin. It was after a beer or two. Mechanically recovered pig eyelids sprinkled with neat curry powder. Cant understand why it isnt more popular over here.

    Keep them coming Wieb, they are a good read. And if it is really Shad writing them, even better.

  10. I just can agree on that - the pigs over here are very lasy - and Craig, I am writing stuff myself